Don't Laugh In Court

Yesterday, I had to tell my self not to break out with a belly laugh in Family Court!

When my daughter went through her divorce 12 years ago , I would get physically ill sitting in court and watching my daughter's soon to be ex and -n-laws putting her through the mill with new charges and court dates.

One such charge was when she had the audacity to keep Stephen at home on Mother's Day! Imagine a mother wanting to be with her own children on that day. That one made her ex-n-laws so mad that they tried to get her put in jail!

Well, my daughter took me and the Bible seriously when it said to turn the other cheek. I must confess though, there were times I just wanted to punch a few cheeks, but I restrained myself.

She never denied visitation and yet somehow, the paternal grand-parents took her to court for Grand-Parent visitation. Their hope was to take Stephen to Korea to Dad and his dad's adulteress and leave him there for them to raise. I never said they were particularly intelligent people!

Well, being a God loving Mother, my daughter kept her chin up, her attitude positive, and tried her best to be the best Mom and person that she could. She kept the door open for visitation because she was always taught that a child should never be blocked from having a relationship with any part of their family.

As a result, Stephens' father decided not to see him for the past 9 years, the grand-parents dropped in and out and now back in to his life and they are actually now regretting all that took place in the past to upset the relationship.

But the best part of all, in court yesterday, my daughter, who was worried that her minuscule child support (from when he made $900 a month) would be going down now that Stephen is 14 actually saw her child support almost double!

Her ex-husband had to do a conference call from Northern California to the Judge. Now this is a man who has had four more kids and his adulteress turned wife is not working. When the Judge asked when my daughter's ex last saw Stephen, he said "around 2000." Mistake #1. When the Judge asked if there was a reason why his (my daughter's ex) wife couldn't work, he told the Judge "NO". Mistake #2. When the Judge asked him if he would like to consider a hardship considering the number of kids her ex has at home, my my daughter's ex didn't understand what the word hardship meant, and he said "NO, I'm fine paying what I do right now." Mistake #3.

Bottom Line Visit your child, zip up your pants and ask for the Judge to explain anything you don't understand!

1. Getting a divorce from a man with no self control = over $25,000

2. Fighting one last time in court without a lawyer = $ - 0 -

3. Hearing your ex-husbands reaction when the Judge doubles his child support because he never visited his child = $ PRICELESS!!!

bitsfrombonnie

Top Ten New Years Resolutions

10. This year, I will spend more time with my kids and grand-kids at their homes, and less time stocking my own fridge.

9. This year, I will pay to have my hair dyed so that my forehead is not dyed chestnut brown.

8. This year, I will try to be successful at weight loss, or gain 10 pounds so I have a better chance at the quarter million on "Biggest Looser".

7. This year, I will watch less TV, because I am too cheap to buy the converter.

6. This year, I won't wait for the other person to leave the bathroom first. I will proudly exit without shame as I look them right in the eye!

5. This year, I will wash my hands every time I leave the public bathroom.

4. This year, I will try not to pick my teeth with my tongue, straws , credit cards or the edge of a piece of paper.

3. This year, I will not jerk my head away when someone catches me staring at them. I will simply keep staring and then smile strangely.

2. This year, I will be kind enough to tell people when I see a whistler hanging from their nose.

And the number one New Years Resolution.....

1. This year, I will stop sniffing my hand every time I touch something.

Happy New Year!!!

bitsfrombonnie

Dear Mother, Our Mother

Dear Mother Our Mother
What Great Love We Share
You Raised Us All Five
With Your Love And Care

You Nurtured And Guided Us
With Discipline And Love
And Lovingly Taught Us
Of Our God Above

You Prepared Us For Life
And Now That We're Grown
You Respect Our Decisions
Though Some Aren't Your Own





Through Good Times And Bad Times
You've Guided Us Through
You're Always There For Us
In All That We Do

Your Patience Abounding
Through Bad Moods And Tempers
You Taught Us Forgiveness
And To Always Remember



That Our Heavenly Father
Will Keep Our Love Strong
And Know That He Is With Us
Through All That Goes Wrong

Dear Mother, Our Mother What Great Love We Share...You Raised Us All Five With Your Love And Care

My Mother's Trunk

I was sitting at the computer doing some work, when I heard my mother groaning behind me. I got up to get her settled in her bed, and give her a little more water before she falls back to sleep. She is bed ridden and has three broken bones from the cancer that has riddled her body. She sleeps most of the day because she is on morphine for the pain. I am thankful for every moment that I get to spend with her as she prepares for her final journey home.





Memories from my childhood come rushing back to me as I take care of my mother. One such memory, is my mothers' old trunk.





When I was a child, my parents had an old trunk in the closet. In that trunk were some old pictures, the family picture album, a few papers, my mothers' wedding dress, my dads pen striped suit, and his sailor suit from the Navy.





There wasn't a lot in that old trunk, but for some reason I would be drawn back over and over again to look at those old things and my imagination would run wild. I would look at my Dads' sailor suit and think of Gene Kelly in a sailor suit dancing along with Frank Sinatra, . I remember getting in trouble for wearing his sailor pants to school once and then trying to sneak them back into the trunk. His pin striped suit made me think of Edward G. Robinson in a gangster movie. My mothers' wedding dress made me think of Betty Grable or Katherine Hepburn in an old movie. It was not a traditional wedding gown, it was a peach suit made of a delicate material with a belt in the middle. I used to try it on and stand in front of the mirror seeing myself as one of those old movie queens. I would even put on gloves and bright liptstick sometimes, and hold one of my mothers cigarettes in my hand like they did in the movies. (that was a time when for some reason, they managed to make smoking look glamorous)

Several years ago, the trunk and all of its contents were ruined when a flood hit where it was being stored. I was so sad to hear that everything was ruined in that old trunk. It held such fun and wonderful memories for me.

Today, I still hang on to those memories and rely on them from time to time to help me get through the tough times.

I just hope that my kids have something to hang on to as wonderful memories about me, the same way I hang on to memories of my Mom, my Dad, and that old trunk.

bitsfrombonnie

Christmas Is Coming!

I was raised to have a full understanding of the words, "It's the thought that counts!". My parents raised five of us with a very limited income. Parents didn't spend a fortune back then to make Christmas special, they didn't have it to spend. The only way they had to make Christmas feel special back then, was to leave crumbs and an empty glass on the counter, and then go outside to jingle bells and shout "HO HO HO, Merry Christmas!!!". And for some reason, we were always more exited than you can imagine!

This was back in a time when neighbors strung lights across to connect with each others homes, and at least 3 houses had speakers rigged to play Holiday music for all of the passers by to hear. Every now and then, you would have to go in and move the needle because the neighbor informed you that they just heard the same line about 200 times.

Moms made homemade cookies to serve throughout December and somehow managed to sew a complete wardrobe for you without you finding out. Kids put cloves in oranges and made handmade ornaments that always had their school picture on it somewhere. For some reason, families just went out together from house to house singing carols. The school Christmas program actually had songs about the birth of Christ!

It was the one time of the year that everyone joined together and were truly thankful for all they had, even though it was not much.

Maybe the change we need in America, is to go back to a time when we worked hard for little, and appreciated a lot!!!

THE FOLLOWING POST WILL BE FUNNY!

Just Yesterday

Just yesterday, I could hear my mom yelling "Bonnie and Billy, get your butt's home right now!!!" as we played outside with our friends after dark.

Just yesterday, I was wearing a plaid skirt with a striped top because I didn't listen when my mom said, "If it's not in the hamper, it won't get washed!".

Just yesterday, my mom split a band candy bar between five kids because we couldn't afford to buy one for each child, but we all loved that candy bar.

Just yesterday, my mom was coming in the front door from work and saying, "I can hear that stereo all the way down the street!".

Just yesterday, my mom was sitting with me at FIDM, to discuss going to College, and saying, "If this is where you want to go to school, I am there for you!".

Just yesterday, we all drove to the chapel in the rain, and mom cried as dad gave me away.

Just yesterday, mom gave me five receiving blankets and said, "I made them bigger so they will last a little longer for the baby!"

Just yesterday, mom was holding me as we stood at my husbands funeral.

Just yesterday, I was holding mom as we stood at my Dad's funeral.

Just yesterday, I found out that my mom has cancer.

Just yesterday, I cried.

Just yesterday, I smiled when I thought of all my yesterdays with mom.

family matters

DON'T LABEL ME!!!

Don't tell me that I don't believe in women's rights just because I don't believe in abortion!
Don't tell me that I'm a religious fanatic, just because I love the Lord with all of my heart!
Don't tell me that who I am voting for is wrong, and chastise me for my political beliefs!
Don't tell me that you think I'm too opinionated while you are beating me up with your opinions!
Don't tell me that we can't disagree and still be friends!!!

family values

bitsfrombonnie

bitsfrombonnie

Angels in the Outfield!

A turbulent October has brought the Angels reign of power, to a cruel and painful end! Did we loose because the Red Sox were just a better team? I don't think so! Was it because we lost our mental game long before Shields threw his final pitch? Maybe! Sometimes, being so far ahead ads more pressure. It's a given that the farther ahead of the league you are, the more you are expected to win. So this brings me to the conclusion that bringing excellent talent to the Angels is not enough. We need to make sure that they have the mental game under their belt next year. With that in mind, I wrote this little poem.


The Angels are my favorite team
I'm a true and devoted fan!
And though the series was my dream
I'll just have to wait again

I cheered them on through every win
As our team became the best!
With the winning streak that they were in
Way out in front of the rest

It was hard to believe their streak would end
With Vladdy, Teixeira, and Tori
We all thought they would take each win
There was no cause for worry

But alas, the Red Sox killed our dream
I'm completely and totally stunned
Considering what I spent for every game
I think you owe me a big fat refund!!!

Your devoted fan!!!

Sushi Ate Out And Got Sick

Yesterday, my daughter and I go out for lunch at a Sushi Bar. Bad Idea!!!

Now I don't claim to be an expert on sushi, but I don't think it should take a long time to get your lunch when they don't even have to cook it.

After waiting at least 15 minutes, the waiter finally comes over to introduce himself. We place our order and wait about another 20 minutes or so until he comes back over and apologizes to us and says that they are out of one of the dishes that we have ordered. After quickly changing out mind, we wait quite awhile longer until our lunch finally comes to us.

The lunch was very good, so we decided to take a chance on dessert. Again, we wait awhile until the server comes back over and lets us know that they are out of our dessert. So we changed out order and waited another 15 minutes for the new dessert. Cinnamon deep fried ice cream with a chocolate drizzle. Sounds great doesn't it? Until I looked down and what I thought was a clump of deep fried mixture, at closer inspection was actually a shrimp tail.

I called the waiter over and again he apologized profusely for shrimp in our plate, and the took it away immediately. We told him to just bring the check. Again we waited for awhile before he came back with the ticket.

During that time, we were sure he was talking to the manager about doing something for us after all of the problems we had trying to get a nice lunch.

You will be happy to know that when the waiter came back. He assured us that the dessert was taken off of our bill.

So if anyone out there wants SUSHI, "RA SUSHI BAR", in Tustin, does not charge for the extra shrimp tail if you get one in your dessert. And, they are out of most of their entree's by noon!!!

Slum it and have a greasy cheeseburger instead!!!

HGTV Is Addicting

I get a lot of Friday's off from work, and today I am home catching up on things I didn't get around to, during my busy week.

In between homework, test taking, practicing songs for choir and worship team, housework, and taking Mandy to lunch, I sat down to watch a little HGTV.

I have decided that I know what is so addicting about HGTV. Although it is very exiting to see how you can completely change a house without spending a fortune, there is one thing that brings women back over and over again.

CARTER OOSTERHOUSE!!!

I totally get it!!!

The man is HOT!!! He's 6'2", People Magazine featured him in the 2003 "Sexiest Men Alive" edition, and he knows how to freakin fix things!!! Could anyone ask for anything more in a man???

Where was he when I was that young and that single? They would be featuring me as the wife of the sexiest man alive in People if he were around back in the day.

Women tune in to HGTV to see him in action. They tune in all of the time hoping that he might even pop up in a commercial.

DO YOU BLAME THEM???

Well, I'm not so old that I don't appreciate real beauty when I see it.

So the up side to the addiction is that you might actually learn something about doing some handy work around the house or designing a nice living space.

He is the reason so many women say, "Carter Can!"

It's a total win, win situation!

Is it Car Trouble Again???

A few days ago, I was rushing to a retirement party for someone at our sister campus. I knew that the whatever fumes I had left in my car, would not get me all the way there so I stopped on the way to the party to get some gas. I was just leaving the gas station, when I get a call on my bluetooth from my boss to again, lettting me know that he would be running late to the party. Up to that point, I had the music cranked up in the car and the air blasting.

I turned down the radio and the air and took the call. When I was done talking to my boss, I happened to hear a banging sound at the back of the car. My first thought was, "Hmmm, What's that sound?"...

I then did what we all do when we hear a strange noise in our cars. I kept the radio down and listened more intently. For awhile, it was quiet, but then I heard it again. I thought for a moment that it might be the vacuum I had sitting at the back of the SUV. But it did not seem to be that kind of a noise.

Then, all of the thoughts start rushing through my head. Maybe the engine that I had replaced over a year ago is going out already. Maybe it is the transmission. What if it is a really expensive problem that I just can't afford to fix? God must be telling me to get the brakes checked out on my mothers car and start driving it instead. Each fear got bigger and bigger!!!

I was a mess! I was getting more and more worried about my car!!! Almost to the point of tears. So, I decided that when I got to work, I would call my mechanic and see if I could get the car in for an appointment to check it out and pray for the best. Once I had made that commitment, I drove to work, got out of my car, heard a friend behind me say "Good Morning!", and as I turned to say "Hi", noticed that my gas cap was dangling outside the gas tank. That was the culprit for all of my needless worry!!

I had to stop for a moment and think about how carried away I got with worrying about the unknown problem that I thought I had.

Moral: Never panic about the unknown! You can't fix what you do not understand!!!

Profiles

I have toyed with the idea of going into a singles website and seeing who is out there with the same interests as I have. My problem is, that I tried that a few years ago when I was single before, and it was disastrous.

It's hard to find someone that is being totally honest in one of those sites. And it's understandable. It's hard for anyone to be totally honest in those sites. You have to sit down and actually describe yourself in black and white. Everything from your body type to your religious beliefs. And you have to go through the torture of finding just the right picture that is flattering to you. No picture, usually means "You don't really want to know what I look like!".

Now back to the body type. I'm sorry, but it is very hard to be completely honest about your body. After all, most women rely on black pants, girdles and spanx to give the illusion of being at least 10 lbs thinner. We shade our faces just right to make our noses look shorter, and to make our cheeks look thinner.

We wax, pluck, shave, lotion, dye, lift and separate, just to give the illusion of having natural beauty! Now why would anyone in their right mind expect someone who is willing to go through all that, to do something silly like tell the truth about their weight???

Do you know a woman who's license tells the truth about her weight? I want to meet her!!! I don't think she exists. Heck, the picture from my old license looks better than the new one, so I still keep it in my wallet. And I have pulled it out before. The clerk didn't even notice that it was out of date. I don't look that thin or that young! Should I throw it away??? No way!!! It gives me some sort of sick comfort to have it in my wallet.

Men do things like that too. How many times have you seen that a guy says that he is athletic and yet he looks like the only part of his body that gets a work out is his right arm on it's way to his mouth with food. Men also like to lie about their income. The ones that don't have it, love to say they are in the higher income ranges. It's hard to fool a woman when you pull up in your 95' Ford Taurus and you have white socks on with your dress slacks!!!

I like the guy I met once who said that he likes to look good for a woman and smell nice. First of all, when I got to Starbucks, I could smell your Old Spice all the way to the door. And looking nice includes the grill!!!

I guess there have been a few success stories from the internet however, I am a bit paranoid about finding true love in a website. I will trust God to bring the right man to me if it is to happen again. After all, he did a great job when he brought the last one to me. I think he really is the best match maker out there!!!

You're No Elvis!

It's really hard to be a great Elvis impersonator! Every year another pathetic Elvis impersonator tries to get noticed on shows like America's Got Talent. They insist on giving us their version of the King by butchering yet another great song.

There was only one King, and unless you have fully embraced him, you cannot be the King! The King was one of a kind. He was unique and no one sounded or acted like him. That is why he became bigger than life.

Very few have successfully performed his act. Very few are able to look like Elvis. Very few step into his persona and become Elvis! It is something that people should not attempt without being totally prepared.

It had to be said. I hope we all have learned something from this!

YOU'RE NO ELVIS!!!

How Did I Get Here???

I am going to be 55 this year! Now if this had happened about 5 years ago, it would be pretty cool. I was single then too, but shall we say....I was a little more on the hottie side. I was always mistaken for being much younger and I could do just about anything. But these days, not so much!

And it all happened so fast!!! It's kind of like when you go somewhere that you've been to a thousand times, but this time you can't remember passing one familiar landmark on the way. This is the year that the senior discount becomes official. AARP is harrassing me with their annoying advertisements, and phrases that only my mother used to say, keep finding their way into my conversations.

Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't change one thing about my life. I love my family and friends, I have had two husbands that I loved dearly, I love my Church, and I love where I work. I just wish I were waiting a little longer to reach this milestone in my life!

WAIT!!! What am I thinking??? It's not like I'm gonna grow up or anything anyway! I'll be fine. Besides, Mandy turns 40 in 8 years. I need to be a good example and be strong!!!

Bring it on 55!!!

Commitment

Today was fan appreciation day at Angel Stadium! Now for those of you who might not have as deep an appreciation for baseball as my family, fan appreciation day is like walking down the red carpet right beside your favorite movie star at the Oscars. It is the one day of the year that you get to see your favorite players and some of them even pose for pictures with you. The other great part of being so close to the players is seeing the excitement my son 'n' law shows when he sees them coming. As the players come onto the field, he giggles like a little girl and gives the play by play of which player is getting closer. He truly reminds me of Doug Heffernen from King of Queens. He's nervous, exited and giddy and as they get closer he gives a nod, winks and says "Hey bro, how ya doin?" As soon as the players pass by, he turns to his brother and says, "Dude! Did you see that? He said Hi to me!".

But I digress! The theme of this blog is "Commitment", and I learned today just what commitment is all about. As we all sat up in the nose bleed section,cheering on the Angels and praying for a win, things were not going so well down on the field. By the 6th inning, the Twins had 3 runs against only 1 run for the Angels. Those of little faith, started leaving so they would not have to witness the impending loss. By the 7th inning stretch, we too decided that things didn't look very good for the Angels. Although the Angels managed to get one more run, we all made a decision to leave at the end of the 7th inning. As true blue Angel fans, the thought of watching them loose from the stands is unberrable!

As we all left the stadium in a state of denial, we tuned into the game on the car radio. Unbelievably, Big Daddy Vladdy hits a three bagger in the 8th right after we left I might ad, to tie up the score. Then the clencher. Gary Matthews Jr. hits a 3 run RBI to win the game! And we all screemed with excitement from a crowded SUV on the freeway home.

So what is the lesson? Commitment is sticking with something or someone through good and bad. Applauding their successes and being there for them through their losses. The Angels came through with their commitment even when many lost their faith. But many of us fans did not do our part. There is a price you pay if you are the driver. Regardless of who's idea it is to leave, everyone blames the driver when they miss the comeback of the day!!!

To summarize:

Cost of an Angel ticket in the nose bleed section - $12.00
Cost for a cold Panda Bowl and soda at the game - $15.00
Cost of watching my son 'n' law act like a star struck fan - Priceless!